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Erica’s celebration of life service will be held at St. Luke’s United Methodist Church on Saturday January 4th at 11:00 am. A light lunch will be served immediately following.  We will have visitation the night before on Friday January 3rd from 5-8pm in the Fellowship Hall off of the main narthex.

Erica was a beloved wife, mother, colleague and friend…model of courage and pillar of strength…was a gift to all, a gift that will continue as a legacy of love and compassion.

She understood what it meant to travel the unknown journey of illness with hope for each new day.   She never let cancer define her life, and cancer does not have the last word now.  Erica showed everyone what it means to LIVE fully day by day, despite difficult circumstances.

“Erica’s Gift” has been formed by friends and colleagues as a designated fund of St. Luke’s United Methodist Church.  This fund will allow Erica to continue in sharing her attitude of hope with other women who are facing cancer and balancing the complexities of family, work, treatment and unpleasant side effects.  Whether it be a meal for the family, medication, house-cleaning or birthday surprises for children, “Erica’s Gift” will offer the support and care a woman needs when she adds cancer to her daily schedule.

We hope people will give a gift for Erica to honor her memory and her caring spirit.   Donations can be made directly to:

St. Luke’s United Methodist Church

c/o Erica’s Gift

100 West 86th Street

Indianapolis, IN 46260

(317) 846-3404

In lieu of flowers we are asking that you consider making a donation to the below memorial fund- “Erica’s Gift” set up by her good friend and pastor Marsha Hutchison__________________________________________________________________________________

Erica Lynn Lampe June 19, 1958 – December 16, 2013

Wild horses couldn’t drag me away.

Wild wild horses, we’ll ride them someday.

-The Rolling Stones

Erica Lampe loved The Rolling Stones, and I’m thinking that if she had the chance to meet Mick Jagger he wouldn’t exactly have been her cup of tea. But I’m pretty sure that Mick would have loved Erica. Rock stars always love tall, beautiful women especially ones that have an easy, stunning smile.

On Monday, December 16, 2013, a cancer stronger than any wild horse finally  dragged Erica away from our lives… and far too soon. As we gather to celebrate her life and wrap our arms around her family, I invite you to remember Erica. I was honored when Erica asked if would really be willing to write her obituary. I would have much preferred to pen something, anything, other than her obituary, like maybe a press release announcing that she had won the Noble Peace Prize (I think she would have won it for creating Frugal Living Communities that resulted in such happy, greed-free populations where world peace was finally achieved). That would have been totally awesome.

But that’s not what I got to write. Let’s take a look at the life of a beautiful wife, mother, sister, daughter and friend.

Erica Lynn Koppes was born on June 19, 1958 in Columbus, OH and was soon followed by the birth of her sister Heather 3 years later.  Her parents, Earl and Barbara, moved the family to Westerville, OH, a suburb of Columbus when Erica was still a young girl.  Erica went to a local elementary school and always marveled on how far away it was and that she walked it alone every day. Erica loved the family home and the neighborhood in Westerville, but felt like a bit of an outsider. Most kids in her neighborhood were Catholic, and Erica’s family was not. While she never became Catholic, she did finally land one of her very own. More on that later.

The next move was to Worthington, OH, where she attended middle school and high school. It was also around that time that Erica got another sibling- her red-headed brother, Dana.  It was here that Erica came out of her shell and began to hone her gift of cultivating lifelong, meaningful friendships (shout outs here to her oldest (not in age) and best friends Cindy Walp and Mary Lentz- friendships she would maintain for over three decades). After graduating from Worthington High School in 1976, Erica worked a year before deciding to enroll in The Ohio State University (she didn’t even ask me to add the “The” so I hope she’s happy that I did it the right way).  She continued to blossom as a young woman, pledging as a Tri Delta and gathering more lucky lifelong friends: roommate Karen Davis, Casey Clayton, and Suzie Mark.

Erica majored in Accounting (because somebody has to), and worked part-time as a cocktail waitress at James Tavern. As fate would have it, a handsome Catholic boy named Mark Lampe also happened to work at James Tavern as a waiter. According to Mark, lots of guys were interested in Erica and there was essentially a waiting list to get her attention.  Unfortunately for Mark, he was about to experience what I firmly believe would have happened to Mick Jagger: not her cup of tea.

Mark did manage to get Erica out on a couple of dates before receiving the dating pink slip when Erica got an internship in Valley Forge, PA. She left for three months and kindly told Mark it was ok if he didn’t call her. Ouch.

When Erica came back, she resumed working at James Tavern, and she and Mark soon started hanging out as friends. “There was this place we liked to go that had half-off Long Island Iced Teas, so we’d go there, have drinks and talk.” I don’t know about you, but I’m sure the half price drinks played prominently in this scenario. Half price is Erica’s favorite price, second only to free.

After a couple of months, Erica decided that Mark was “ok,” and they began dating. Three years later on October 26, 1985, they got married. The newlyweds lived in Columbus for two years before moving to Syracuse, NY. Erica got a job that she truly loved, working for a public television station in their underwriting department, ultimately becoming the department manager. She was very involved in the annual televised auction, which included live on-air auction and pledge campaigning. (“Really?” I asked Mark. “Erica who didn’t like to be the center of attention, who would defer to almost anyone else in a group to be a spokesperson? That Erica?”).  Turns out Mark and Erica had signed up for Toastmasters when they moved to Syracuse, and that experience significantly helped boost Erica’s confidence in public speaking. I bet Erica made good TV. I would definitely have bought a Public TV tote from her.

While in Syracuse, Mark and Erica enjoyed renovating their home and traveling (including Erica’s favorite destination, Europe). During this time, however, Erica also experienced a sudden, tragic loss when her father, Earl, suffered a heart attack and died in February 1992.  But there was also great joy that year when Erica became a mother. Their daughter, Taylor, was born on September 10, 1992, becoming the first of the two greatest joys of Erica’s life.  While still living in Syracuse, Erica also suffered the loss of her mother, Barbara, who had been diagnosed with leukemia. It was obviously a very sad time for Erica, her siblings and family.

Better days were ahead. Mark was transferred to Indianapolis in 1996. Erica got a job working for Boehringer Mannheim (now Roche), and when Ryan (the second great joy) was born on April 23, 1997, the Lampe’s decided that Erica would stay home full time with their two young children.  Taylor was enrolled in preschool at Meridian St. UMC, and that’s where Erica met another mom who would become another  of her great friends. Dana Guild invited Erica to come with her to a group for moms with young kids at Dana’s church, St. Luke’s UMC, and the rest is history.  Mark and Erica joined St. Luke’s in 1998 where they found an amazing community and group of friends.  Erica became active in Eve Circle, they both participated in Fellowship Commission, and eventually Erica joined the staff part-time in the finance office.

Erica and I met in Eve Circle when our children were young. We were in euchre club together, were co-workers at St. Luke’s and bonded in a Sunday afternoon book club. Her favorite book would be just about anything I didn’t choose for our book group to read. I used to tease Erica about her frequent inability to finish a book prior to meeting to discuss it. (She didn’t get the book finished because she had to wait until the book was available at the library; she wasn’t about to buy it.) “Full price” was not in her vocabulary, she would drive 20 miles to save a few bucks, dig relentlessly for the best deals, and proudly talk about the stunning blouse she was wearing and how little she paid for it.

Erica was pretty much state-of-the-art humble and would likely insist that she wasn’t that interesting.  I beg to disagree; check out a short list of her eclectic favorites. In addition to The Rolling Stones, Erica loved disco (I am not making that up) and classic rock. She was a major Harry Potter fan, loved the movie “The Jerk” with Steve Martin, NPR and The Diane Rehm show. (Disco and Diane Rehm? That’s just crazy.) She enjoyed tennis, skiing, biking and also dabbled in painting, scrapbooking, custom cards, and had an intense love for travel. She was also very active volunteering at the Indianapolis Art Center and worked as a docent at the Indianapolis Museum of Art.  She loved spending time with friends. She raised two beautiful, talented children who benefited from her gentle wisdom, quiet courage and unconditional love.  She adored her partner, Mark, and was the love of his life.

When she was diagnosed with cancer in 2008, the St. Luke’s community was a source of great support and strength for Erica and her family, and remained a major part of her support group throughout her illness.  She gained strength to battle the cancer from her deep support group of longtime friends, family and co-workers. But it is really she who taught all of us the true nature of strength and courage.

As I watched how Erica conducted herself as the cancer advanced, it occurred to me that she was showing all of us the right way to finish something.  She handled this ending with grace, determination, a serious to-do list, her trademark honesty, humor and that beautiful, unforgettable smile.  She faced her illness with an inner strength, drive and determination; wanting to simply live her life as normal as possible.  She showed us that despite the enormous challenges, in the end it was really about being present and being a good friend.  Thank you for the gift that you were in all of our lives. We miss you and love you.

Ride the wild horses, Erica.

Written with Love by Lori Cranford